Take all the lists of New Year's resolutions people are making around the country, and you can bet that many of them will stress the need to "go on a diet," "eat better," "eat less carbs" or something similar.
You've seen these lists. Maybe you've made some. They sound like this:
- "I will run four miles five times a week."
- "I will lose 37 pounds to return to the weight I was as a freshman in high school."
- "I will increase my income by $20,000."
- "I will stop buying things I enjoy so that I can save for retirement. I'll make things instead."
And so on. The person who made this list is going to be pretty busy, and probably pretty unhappy. It's not that the goals are bad ones; it's just that they're unrealistic for most of us. Unless you're working with a coach who is helping you change your lifestyle in huge ways, this kind of goal setting isn't sustainable. It's tiring and disheartening.
What if you made a list of New Year's resolutions that weren't likely to be discouraging, overwhelming, and entrapping?
Try it with me. I resolve:
- ...to do things that help my body feel good.
It might be using certain lotions, taking a walk, or using aromatherapy -- just something that pleases the body. - ...to schedule rest for myself.
Rest can be travel, sleep, calling a friend, journaling, or anything else that brings calm. It should be on the calendar, though, because we fill up spaces that aren't already taken -- usually with things that add rather than ease stress. - ...to try five foods that I've always wanted to try, but thought were "unhealthy" (and focus on the experience).
If five is too many, try three. Or one. Maybe you want to know how a truffle tastes. Or a smoothie. Or the tomato bisque at that restaurant on the corner. It can be anything, but the goal is to spend the time to taste new flavors intentionally. - ...to wear clothes that are comfortable and attractive.
Wearing clothes that are too loose (to hide the body) or too tight ("because that's the size I wear") isn't kind. It's a punishment to the body. Partner with your body instead. Maybe you haven't dressed up in a while. Or, maybe all your clothes for dressing down are sweatsuits. Change it up, and bring someone with you if you need to shop. - ...to spend time with people I like.
You need the sense of connection. We all do. - ...to find out what a full night's sleep is like.
I'm not suggesting that you regiment your life to get eight hours every night. But wouldn't it feel luxurious to have eight some of the time? If you don't like your bed, try a hotel for a night just for the experience.
Above all, what you choose should be things you enjoy that aren't destructive to you. You might actually like dieting because it gives you a sense of control, for example, but you have a 95% chance of gaining the weight back. That's taking a big chance.
We aren't talking about earth-shattering life changes -- just small things to extend a kind of acceptance to yourself. Some who read this will hardly be able to imagine how good some of them would feel (whether physically or emotionally). Others will probably feel as though these ideas, or similar ones, are not worth the time. But do you think they'd be good gifts for someone you know? If they're fine for someone else, it's likely that you can benefit as well.
